I guess what makes it worse is when your husband takes it really hard. When you still have contractions, and have to refuse pain killers from the doctors. When instead you refuse a D&C and drive home to miscarriage the baby naturally, and you still see bits and pieces that you know are human but still are not human.
What makes it not so hard is the fact that its real, you can accept it, and when you accept it inshallah you can have Sabr (patience) by Allah's swt will.
The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah upon him, said, "By the One in Whose hands is my soul, the miscarried fetus will drag his mother to paradise by his [umbilical] cord if she was patient [with the miscarriage], hoping to be rewarded." [Ahmad]
What else do you say? It could have been a boy. It could have been a girl. It could have said mama and baba and it could have said la ilaha ilallah. But instead the baby is in Jannah, and will never have to suffer this awful world and if I can make it through and be faithful to my Rabb I can meet that child one day.
26 comments:
Oh dear Lord! Your words brought tears to my eyes. You will be in my duaas! And may Allah (swt) keep you strong!!
Allah (swt) surely knows best!
salaam alaikum,
Big HUGS to you!!! I am so sorry for you loss, i can only imagine how devestated you both are. I know everyone says to remain patient and pray and yes that is true but its also hard to be patient when something like this happens. My friend has a relative whose 1 month old died in her sleep. 2 years later she has a new baby and another baby on the way. Take time and grieve, even join a support group might be helpful for a loss like this. Feel free to message me anytime if ud like to just chat, vent, etc. Im a good listener =)
Salamualaykum my dear sister,
Its my first comment on your blog although I read regularly. You are very strong and I hope people learn from you. I pray Allah blesses you with many children in the near future. This may be the one thing that leads you to jannah. Be patient my sister even though it is painful.
Salams
Asalamu Alaikum, I dont know what to say. 'Sorry' just feels wrong. I know that we dont really talk often or know each other well and I haven't been in your position so I can only imagine but I want you to know that if there is anything I can do for you, if you ever want to talk, to vent or anything really please don't hesitate to call, email or text. Be strong love. Take care of yourself. xx Ma'asalama
<3 May Allah reward you for your patience and shortcomings. =(
salaaam dear,
im so sorry for loss.i cnt exactly say dat i knw what are u facing, but my had 9 miscarriages before but alhamdulillah now she has 4 big n healthy childrenn dat is us. be strong . Allah swt is alwys with u no matter what
Silla
You are a soldier. Walahi!
I Love you truely, and wish nothing but the best for you. from ur first few blog posts till now, you have grown so much as a person, and as a muslim and it shows so much. May Allah Preserve your iman and increase it always as so long as you continue to seek him only in times of grief and happiness (Ameen) <3 Forever and always in my du'as.
Assalaam Alaikum sis,
I have no idea what to say and like someone said above sorry doesn't seem right. My heart goes out to you but more importantly you are my sincere du'as! Many hugs! Stay strong and brave and know that Allah (SWT) knows best. Insha'Allah, you are able to meet your baby in jannah!
Like everyone else said if you ever need to talk or vent or anything please don't hesitate to send me a message. We should all be there for our fellow sisters in the Ummah. =)
May Allah (SWT) bless you with a beautiful, healthy baby when He wills, Ameen.
May Allah ease your pain and give you and your husband patience to get through this hardship.
Most early first trimester don't require a D+C ,however like any labour and delivery there can be complications.
Retained products of conception that can cause a uterine infection.
Uterine infections can be life threatning if left untreated.
They can lead to septic shock,they can also lead to difficulty conceiving in the future.
So young sis, be aware of the early signs of infection, prolonged or heaving bleeding,increase of cramps in the days following the miscarriage and most important fever and chills.Insha Allah you will get through this without any complications.
Sameerah
What a beautiful post you have written. I am truly sorry for your loss, I can't imagine what you are going through :(
@Rose Water: Sorry, I had no clue it would make anyone tear up. But jazackallahu khairn for your dua.
@Rene's Bare Essentials: Walaikam salaam sister! aww *hugs* back. Thank you.
@1st anonymous: Walaikum salaam sister...thanks for writing to me since I know you are a invisible reader of mine. I agree, this could be the single thing that sends me to Jannah, by Allah's swt will. And also Ameen to your dua- I want many many children.
@Amira: You know I texted you immediately, and thank you for all of your help. Any time I've texted you, you have always helped me. May allah swt bless you sister, jazackallahu khairn for everything!!
@Slave2Allah: Ameen, sister.
@IamSillah: Salaamu Alaikum. I just wanted to let you know I love your blog, and thank you for your kind words.
@Life's Balance Beam: Aw sis, I'm a soldier? I can't lie that makes me feel good haha. Only Allah swt knows. :D Anyway you are another one of the sisters who I talked to over text and fb and thank you for everything. You were another sincere muslim sister who was reassuring me everything by Allah's swt will- which is one of the greatest things to be told. Again, Jazackallahu khairn and inshallah one day we will meet in jannah, (with our many children) ameen!
@Sara سارة : Jazackallahu khairn. Thank you for thinking of me and calling me your sister...calling me your sister honestly means a lot to me.
@2nd anonymous (SAMEERAH): Jazackallahu khairn for worrying about me and telling me the risks of natural miscarriages. And for calling me a young sis :D Alhamdullilah so far things have been going great in regards to how my body is handling things. The doctor told me to watch out for bleeding heavier than a period, and that the bleeding i was having at the time was perfectly normal. My bleeding has lightened, alhamdullilah, and I am still passing tissue. Sorry for tmi. Also I am going to have a follow up with my OB/GYN within the next week or so and if they say things have no progressed far enough i will probably have a D&C. However I do think I am going to be alright THANK GOD. Again I realllyy appreciate the fact that you would warn me against the dangers and tell-tale signs of a miscarriage gone-wrong.
@Amalia: *hugs* Thank you sis.
wasalaaam sweeety. thanx bdw n b strong ok :) *hugs*
Silla
*hugs* I can't imagine exactly what you're going through, but I know that your pain is very real.
I am praying that you will be blessed again to carry a life within you. Blessings to you and your husband too.
Salam hun
i only read this today, may Allah compensate you for your loss, you are such a sincere muslimah to take it the way you have. May Allah swt bless you abundantly.I love you loads and pray that your dreams are fulfilled very soon. thinking about you xx
***HUGS****
May Allah grant you healing in this time of grief and many healthy children in the future, insha'Allah.
I can't begin to describe how proud I am of you for being soo strong. I always think of you as positive and just so lovely, I can't imagine how you must feel. I'm sorry for your loss and I'm sorry for only reading this just now. Allah truly does know best. He will surely reward you for your patience, your so very inspiring sis. I will make dua for you <3
Insha'Allah your getting on well, take care my lovely *hugs*
You are so strong. May Allah SWT give you patience and a boost of more strength ( which you already have !!! ). I'll keep you and your family in my du'aas.
Post a Comment